Chapter 22: the untitled

I just can't not seem to find the right words to to describe the feelings. There are no words adequate enough as I sit here crying trying to take it all in trying to process it & not truelly understanding why. Wishing, hoping & praying for people I do not even know but share one common link that seems to make it all so much more profound.

Chapter 21: what were we thinking & something is wrong

well, we decided to try taking all the kids in to get pictures done. Needless to say it went even worse then I imagined it could. We got great pictures of Felix he was a total ham. And he tried so hard to get the babies to smile. Kash started off ok until the photographer touched him then it was all down hill & he refused to take any pictures & just cried & we got 2 pictures of him with his typical half cry half laugh look. Sage screamed her head off the entire time, which was reallyh wierd I couldn't figure out what the problem was. We did luck out & get one good family picture it was a miracle everyone was smiling at the same time. Well as soon as we left the photo place Sage & Kash got really sick. Kash just was sick for a couple hours Sage was sick for 2 weeks. So it's finally been almost a month & Sage is finally back up & running. sort of! I'm hoping one of these days I can get a doctor to listen to me & quit trying to tell me it's just a cold or virus or something cause she doesn'r have any of those right now. I hate sounding like the crazy lady her takes her kids to the doctor all the time convinced something is wrong but isn't but I really know something is not right. Sage has been having more & more trouble breathing at night, her doctor keeps telling me she is just a breath holder. Well yeah when she cries sometimes she does hold her breath but not when she is sleep she actually gasps for air & makes choking noises.... also she has been using her left arm less & less & it isn't growing like her right one. She has also become very sensitive on the left side of her chest you barely touch it & she says it hurts. before once in a blue moon she would say that her chest hurt but now it has been come more & more now it is a daily thing complain that her left side of her chest hurts, now her left side of her stomach & as of yesterday her left leg hurts....I just don't understand what is going on & no one will listen to me! I just don't know what to do anymore! here's to frustration!!!!
Other news on the home front: Felix is learning how to read I'm super excited about it I can't wait till he is really good at it. He is so excited about it & i'm so proud of him, I hope he becomes a book worm like me lol.
Kash has become a kissy huggy boy. He still has some anger issues but at least now he will give you a hug & kiss after wards & say sorry. Like tonight when he punched me in the eye becuase I was helping Felix get his Tae Kwon Do stuff on instead of handing him another cracker. At least he realizes he sis wrong & appoligizes it's a start!

Chapter 20: Let the holiday season begin

So it's November 28 & my christmas shopping is done! We spent Thanksgiving in town at my brothers house with his wife & kids my mother-in-law (who is also my bro's mother in law) our mother in laws boyfriend his kids & grandkids & our brother in law with his wife & 2 of his kids. Sorry to say but it was the worst Thanksgiving of my life & never want to do that again & the food was not so good. But hey wants the holidays without having to all the things you don't want to & the family feuding?! lol anyways we are rounding the corner into Christmas so bring it on. Unlike last year I'm ready so lets go!

Chapter 19: week of head spinning

WOW what a crazy week we have had & the weekend is going to be even more head spinning! Holiday season is so bitter sweet, the stress, the fighting, the work, the money, the "fallen" friends & family but the blessings, dreams, wishes, little hands & smiles, the love & closeness of family & friends, you have got to love this time of year. Thanksgiving is just around the corner with Christmas & birthday season for our huge family trailing close behind.
Let's see Sage started to hurt pretty bad monday & just kept getting worse by thurday she wasn't eating, hardly drinking & just laid there wimpering. I took her to the walk in & turns out she picked up a lovely bacterial-yeast infection in her mouth & down her throat from surgery. So now she is on 4 different meds that she fights taking with all her might & we are praying no one else ends up with it. She is so miserable, constant fever & it must be very painful because she hardly complains normally but she isn't talking just wimpering & wanting to be held & pointing down her throat. My poor little princess.
In good news though, Felix lost his first tooth Thursday night. It had been loose for awhile now & i tried to pull it out but it was just so tiny I couldn't get a grip. Well Felix & Kash were rolling around on the floor pretending to be stream rollers. Next thing you know Felix is running around the house super excited & screaming "my tooth my tooth it fianlly came out" Then he turns to me & says all happy as a clam "all I needed was my brothers help" too cute! So Felix puts his tooth in a ziplock bag so his tooth wouldn't fall under his bed & get lost so the tooth fairy wouldn't leave him any money. I was so excited to get to play tooth fairy. The next morning when he woke up there was 5 $1 bills under his pillow & you would have thought he had won the lottery! He was so happy & kept saying he was going to tell everyone at school all about it. Well he has another lose tooth that shoudl be out any day, so he says to me "mom mom I have another tooth that will come out soon & i'll get another 5 dollars, so if I save this 5 dollars & get another 5 dollars I can buy a cooler toy then if I just used this 5 dollars cause then I would have 10 whole dollars" what a crazy little kid, i'm happy he is getting the concept of saving & money, I must be doing something right. lol
In Kash news, he is doing better & better. He is my cuddly lover boy, he gives the best hugs. He is still learning more & more words. Working on his balance & all around gracefulness considering he is a huge clutz but hey so am I. Kash has become a HUGE elmo fan. So he spends most of his day talking about Melmo (as he calls elmo) & trying to get as many treats from abuela as possible. Oh yeah he also has started copying Felix. Sage was feeling exspecially crappy late thursday afternoon & Felix was trying to cheer her up. So Felix is touching Sage's knee with one finger & then falling on the floor saying "sage you got me" & things like that. Well here comes Kash teetering in & usually he would just watch for a few seconds & off he would go but this day he watched for a little bit & all of a sudden he was doing the same thing. It was really kool. Kash is kind of my loner kid, I have a feeling he is going to be just like me as he grows up. Quietly observing his surroundings, loving books & school, just having a few really close friends & can quietly occupy himself.
Tonight after work D surprised me by bringing me a coffee & we decided to run to target to get a bunch of stuff we needed. As we were walking in D was carrying Kash I was carrying Sage who was hiding in her blanket & Felix between. So Kash is pointing at Sage & saying Baby Baby trying to talk to D about Sage. Well Kash is the youngest so D is telling him no you are the baby Kash is the baby & Kash looked right at him & says No I'm Not! 2 very hysterical things, first Sage & Kash call each other baby, I find it entertaining I have to wonder how they see each other if you know what I mean, I hope so cause I'm not sure I can explain it right now I'm so tired. Secondly, Kash doesn't say very many words, just single words like he can't really name things like chair, bottle...he can with a few things but that is what he has been working on & he talks alot but it's mostly just jibberish with phrases & sentences hidden in you just have to listen closely he has always done that. like he will follow you around & say what are you doing (that is exactly what he will say too, it's not like little kid talk) but he can't tell you what a chair is....i just find it very uniquely wierd!
So anyways i'm going to enjoy my rest cause tomorrow we are exchanging furniture with my mom it's a great way of having "new furniture" & change of scenery with out having to spend a bunch of money. And we have to go buy a new TV thank goodness for gift cards! And we have the local adoption celebration tomorrow! It's going to be a very long but short weekend!

Chapter 18: updates & my man Felix

Let's see it's November 19...Sage had her tonsils & adnoids out last friday. We were supposed to spend the night at the hospital because she is so tiny but she was doing so well they let us go home that night. Sage has been doing great since the surgery, well until monday night when she started to run a fever, her throat was hurting, she was refusing to drink anything & she had the most horrible breath ever. Turns out she picked up a lovely case of strep throat...
Anyways, friday night we got to go home thank goodness becuase our nephew was sick & so our boys couldn't spend the night. Felix was pretty sad about it but he understood. My mom felt really bad about it because she was the one who had to tell him but to make matters worse she was picking Felix up from school & she heard him tell one of his friends how he was going to have a sleepover & he was so excited & then my mom had to tell him. poor mom. Our nephew ended up feeling better by saturday morning it was a fast moving bug that we have all had so Felix spent saturday night at their house & had a blast. We stayed home with the babies & our friend Chad came over with his wife Ally & their daughter Autumn who is just a little older then Kash & Sage. The kids played & Chad made supper, salmon & couscous. It was the best dinner I have had in a very long time & the kids had fun getting to know each other & play. Sunday was cleaning day so nothing really fun about that except D has been bugging me again about letting him go on an ice fishing trip to Devil's Lake for a weekend, him, Felix & Chad. They have been trying for 2 years now, but I don't know I just keep saying no, until.....
Monday morning I took Felix to school we were driving along talking about how it was cold outside & the lakes were freezing. Well, Felix proceeds to tell me "Well mom they have these bunk houses that you can stay in you can sleep there on the ice all weekend if you want & you know I love ice fishing & I can sleep on the top bunk cause I'm a big boy & I really really want to go can I mom can I please" so of course I gave in & said yes. I swear D coached him on this, I know felix loves & I mean LOVES ice fishing but come... D swears he didn't tell Felix to do it he just told him about the idea of the fishing trip & Felix did his typical drama faint & got really excited. Yes I know my son drama faints, he does the whole back of the hand on the forehead & melts to the floor thing, it's really funny.
Felix has to be the most confusing kid, I can't quite figure him out. He loves musicals & plays, he has a huge fashionation of the human body & how it all works.he wants to marry a man & a woman he is super kissy & is always getting into trouble at school for being to affectionate, he wants to adopt kids, he is a little actor, he loves pink & yellow, he loves barbies, tea parties & monster trucks & martial arts. He wants to be a chiroprator & an MMA fighter, he loves ice fishing but not fishing in a boat. He wants to hunt & shoot a deer & a goose yet he finds it cruel to hurt animals. He is super out going friends with everyone always the center of attention the funny guy in class, but yet he is shy & has no friends. he loves to have his picture taken & be filmed he totally hams it up but he hates to have his picture taken when people are around to see it then he gets mad & throws a fit. Felix the king of opposites.

Kash's adoption journey

Kash Mykel Alejandro Tuel

Sage's adoption journey

Sage Dyana Nohemy Tuel

Felix adoption journey

Felix Andres Stanley Tuel


ok so it's not done yet but I made each of the kids a montage from referral to the point of them landing at the airport in Fargo, but I need to get some copies of pictures from family members.... hope you enjoy!

Chapter 14: National Adoption Month & so much to give thanks for

Let's see we have finally made our way into the beginning of November!
Sage gets her tonsils & adnoids out on Friday 11-14-08 & she will have to stay over night at the hospital because she is so little. Felix & Kash will be having a sleep over at Aunty Jennifer & Uncle Andy's house, Felix can't wait. I'm curious to see how Kash does though, it will be his first sleep over. Let's see what else is going on, this month has really started out in slow motion, but I guess after all the excitement of last month we could use a little break. On 11-8-08 we took the kids to see Sesame Street Live, Kash is obsessed with Elmo. There is an adoption celebration at a local church this coming weekend & also a cultural diversity celebration, so I hoping we get to go to both but it all depends on how little miss Sage is doing. Sage's new words are coffee, Thank you, night night, love you.
Kash's new words are wawa for water, bean, banana, poopy, mikey, snow.
We had our first parent teacher conference at school. Felix is doing fabulous at school except he keep seem to stop moving all the time. It's true Felix is incapable of sitting still always on the move. But he is absorbing everything like a little sponge. Felix is super excited for ice fishing is talking about it nonstop!
Kash saw snow first time & he loves to walk in it he laughs & says snow over & over. Sage loves the snow sometimes & of course Felix is all about winter!
Other news is I'm almost done with Christmas shopping, I really don't want to be in a rushed panic like last year. heck last year we barely had a tree in time....
well that's it so far for this month, why does November seem to just be so quiet?

Chapter 13: random little things

At the end of October Sage fell down & hit her head on the coffee table needless to say it was a late night at the ER while she got staples. She has this amazingly high tolerance for pain though so really it wasn't too bad.
Felix is becoming so much like his father it's scary. He is really into politics now. They had a mock election at Felix's school, they voted for 2 people & all the candidates were seperate, no running mates. So Felix voted for Obama & Palin. He said he voted for Obama becuase he is really smart & nice. And he voted for Palin because she was cute & he wanted to give her a kiss.
Kash has developed an allergy to diapers. So Sage & Kash are working on potty training but it's not going so well. Sage can't tell if she has to go to the bathroom & we don't know for sure if its that she just doesn't get it yet or if she really can't feel it, guess we just have to wait & see. Kash knows when he has to go potty but is terrified of the potty.
Oh yeah last but not least in October the doctors finally figured out what they think is wrong with Sage! They believe she has poland's syndrome & rib anomilies. It's so different for everyone, so we really don't know what to expect so we just take it as it comes. Of course there has to be a crazy part to it all, Poland's Syndrome usually only happens to boys & it usually effects the right side. Well, first off Sage is a girl of course & second off it effects her left side. Go figure, it's just so typical Sage. She defiantly doesn't follow the crowd.....

Chapter 12: The smell of fall

Fall is in the air! My favorite time of the year. In October Sage had oral surgery, they pulled out her 2 front teeth & capped the rest. Since then she is so much more happy & she is eating & gaining weight finally! Felix also has grown in leaps & bounds. It seems like he just woke up one morning 4 inches taller! Kash has really started to come into his own. We are so proud of all our kids. Felix is learning to read & is very excited about it. Kash is learning more & more words & learning to trust me. Sage is learning words & phrases, every time I turn around it's some thing new. October 19th Derek & I with our kids, Nik & Brian (home on leave from Iraq) along with my brother Andy, his wife & Derek's sister Jennifer, & their 4 kids, Chelsea, Nathan, Brody & Mya went to the local pumkin patch. The kids really amazing by everything. Sage really loves the pumkins, she kept hugging & kissing them. Kash kept riding the little train, he loved the car that looked like a pig. Felix had fun playing in the hay. On October 26th we all got together at Andy & Jennifers house to have a pumpkin carving party. Really was really great watching all the kids pick out faces for their pumpkins. Felix the old pro got right in there & started working on his pumpkin. Chelsea & I helped Sage. She was really into what was going on. I cut her pumpkin open & showed her what to do & she wook over right away. Sage worked so hard on pulling all the pumpkin goo out. Then Chelsea helped her make her face. Kash had no interest in it at all. He spent the whole time playing with the trucks & cars with Brody. Finally I take you to Halloween. Felix decided we should do the Star Wars theme & he picked out customes for all of us. Felix was Darth Vadar, Sage was Princess Leia, Kash was chewbacca, I was Queen Amidala & Derek was the syth. We went trick or treating at a nursing home. Kash loved getting all the candy, he is my food kid. The excitement of the night was alittle too much for them & they all fell asleep in the car before we were even a block away.

Chapter 11: Oh where oh where has my little Felix gone?

Well, to Kindergarten of course! This fall Felix went off to kindergarten. He was sooooo excited to be a big kid & go to school. And I got the opportunity to embarass him on his first day of school by walking him into class & taking lots of pictures. Felix has become kind of camera shy...
Anyways, he is doing really well & loves going to school. First favorite class is gym. On Tuesday after school he has Spanish club & he was really excited to share with them how he is from Guatemala. It has also brought on a renewed interest in his adoption story, so he have been having wonderful conversations about his life prior to us.
Also Felix is still in Tae Kwon Do, he has been doing it for almost a year & a half. He is currently a purple belt. Last month we went to regional tournaments in South Dakota & he won his first trophy to go along with all his medals.
I can't believe how much he has grown & changed over the last 2 years; it brings me lots of feelings all at once of sadness & joy. How quickly they grow up, you don't want to blink for fear when you open your eyes they will be 20 yrs old....

Chapter 10: Roaring Party Time

Ok, so Sage turned 2 yrs old on 8-8-08. So on 8-9-08 we decided since the weather had been so beautiful we would have her birthday party at home in our front yard. We invited all our friends & family since not many people had met Sage & no one had really met Kash. We have a huge jungle gym set up in the front yard & then since Sage loves water so much we put up a bunch of water toys, baby pools & water slides for all the kids to play on. Then my friend Nik & I spent 2 weeks of our lives cutting & pasting Yo Gabba Gabba decorations. Sage loves Yo Gabba Gabba but of course at the time it was a newer show so there was no toys or birthday stuff for it. We ended up baking like 150 cupcakes & decorating them with the Yo Gabba Gabba characters, it was alot of work but it really was fun. Derek grilled for everyone & we had all the typical cook out foods plus I got up early that morning & made black beans, yellow rice, & tortillas. Felix was super excited for the black beans they are his favorite. Anyways we ended up having 2 pinatas one for the little kids & one for the big kids. It was great having so many friends & family members come over & celebrate her birthday & welcome Kash & Sage to the family.

Chapter 9: Welcome to the Crazy

Well, lets see I'm so bad about keeping everything up to date.....
Kash came home on June 24, 2008. It was a long journey & we are very glad it is over. Kash had a really hard time adjusting, he hated women with a passion. He spent his days & nights screaming his head off & see how many bruises he could leave & how much hair he could pull out from Sage & I. But slowly a little at a time he has been settling in just fine & finding his place in our crazy lives. And now as of today 11-12-08 he is all settled in, life is mirvalously crazy, & we are one loud happy & crazy family.

Finally giving into technology

Well, I finally decided to take our famiy into the computer era... I have come to realize that blogs are a great way to get family events & news to the whole family with out having to worry that someone is missed or like the telephone game; becomes ditorted. Maybe I should have started this blog when we first decided to adopt our son Felix, I think it would have helped....lol
But what can I say we are always late with everything, like I tell everyone we are on Tuel Time.
So here we go hope you all enjoy the updates on the fam.